Monday, December 15, 2008

Holiday High Jinks: Part IV, (updated)

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ME to Audible, 12/04/2008 03:40 PM:
Last month there was a promotion to receive a $10 credit with the purchase of 4 audio books. So I went ahead and bought some audio books that I would have eventually bought one at a time, but certainly didn't need just yet.

However, I am not seeing the $10 credit on my account. Please advise.

AUDIBLE to me, 12/04/2008 4:25 PM:
Thank you for contacting Audible.

I see that you're inquiring of the $10 coupon that's to be issued because of the Listener Rewards promotion we started on 10/28/08. As outlined in the emails we sent out, the promotion ran from the end of October and ended on 11/27/08. I certainly see that these purchases were made within the above dates. Also, all eligible purchases must have a regular price of $14.95 or higher. In looking at your account, that only one out of the four titles had a regular price of at least $14.95. It's for this reason the $10 coupon has not been added to your account.

If you did not see the promotion details we outlined on our site at the time offer, I do apologize.

Here at Audible, we truly value and appreciate your business; if you need further assistance, please respond to this email or if you wish, please provide me with a contact number and the best available time to reach you.

For additional questions, how to contact us and hours of operation, please visit us at:

Edwin S.
Audible Customer Support

ME to Audible, 12/04/2008 6:25 PM:
I DID see the promotional details that were included in the email sent to me, "*Eligible audio programs must have a regular price of $14.95 or higher. Offer ends Thursday, November 27, 2008 at 11:59 pm EST. Customers who purchase four eligible audio programs during the promotional period will have a $10 Audible coupon dropped into their account no later than Monday, December 8, 2008"

Now, upon re-reading that, I see that I may have expected the $10 coupon too early since the promo states I would receive it no later than Dec. 8, but I am NOT misunderstanding what the conditions were for the promo. In fact you repeated those same conditions, "all eligible purchases must have a regular price of $14.95 or higher". Please note the use of the term "REGULAR PRICE" and NOT "Member Price". When I visit, those are two distictively different figures.

My purchases during the promotional time period were as follows:
Undead and Unworthy - REGULAR PRICE: $25.07;
Club Dead - REGULAR PRICE: $31.47;
Living Dead in Dallas - REGULAR PRICE: $29.37
Living with the Dead - REGULAR PRICE: $20.97

Therefore, based on the above information, I DID meet the requirements of the promotion and purchased those audio books in good faith based on the stated promotion requirements. If you are unable to add the $10 coupon to my account, please pass this incident report onto a supervisor who CAN add it.

AUDIBLE to me, 12/05/2008 10:41 AM:
So Intelligent- NOTThank you for the reply and I am very sorry for not further clarifying the purchase. The books purchased during this period was purchased during our Semi-Annual Half Price Sale. These qualifying books' regular price was, therefore, modified to reflect the sale. Please consider the following list of titles purchased on 11/11/08:

1).Undead and Unworthy
Regular Price: $25.87
Regular Price on 11/11: $12.93

2). Club Dead
Regular Price Now: $31.47
Regular Price on 11/11: $15.73

3). Living Dead in Dallas
Regular Price Now: $29.37
Regular Price on 11/11: $14.68

Edwin Slippy, the Christmas WeaselBy the time you purchased your forth book,"Living with the Dead: Women of the Otherworld, Book 9", the Semi-Annual Sale was over and the regular price for this book was and is $20.97. As you can see, this was just as I outlined in my previous email: only one of the four purchases was eligible in the Listener Rewards promotion.

For additional questions, how to contact us and hours of operation, please visit us at:

Edwin S.
Audible Customer Support

Disbelief..........Head Desk..........Asshole

ME to Audible, 12/5/2008 11:42 AM:
Nice try. But again I tell you that the promo stated REGULAR price, NOT half price sale price. I made my purchases based on the promotion's statement of conditions and it is reasonable to expect Audible to comply with those conditions. To any reasonable person, it is beginning to appear that Audible engaged in a deceptive sales tactic. I want all communication in this incident forwarded to Audible management.

Naughty SantaI never heard back from that ol' Christmas Weasel, Edwin Slippy (as I've affectionately named him; note his artist's depiction at right and above right), but I checked my Audible account the next day and there was a $10 credit sitting there. Then, a couple of days later, I received the following:

AUDIBLE to me, 12/08/2008 12:03 PM:
Congratulations! You've received a $10 Listening Reward. This coupon is good for any audio program in the store.

We've already dropped this gift of savings in your Audible account so you can spend it right away. Remember, this $10 coupon expires on December 31, 2008, at 11:59PM (ET).

So I bought Stephanie Laurens' Four In Hand for $2.56 after the credit. It's actually a sweet, not spicy, Regency from 1999. But I needed something to break up all the Urban Fantasy and Paranormal Romance I've been listening to lately and, after sampling this one, I liked the sound of the narrator, Ashford MacNab's (a woman!), voice. Besides, with all the smexiness behind closed doors, that means I won't get a bad case of the 12-year-old-girl-giggles.

In conclusion, Audible Customer Service... UR doin' it WRONG. Regular price means regular half-price SALE price? REALLY? That's the best you've got?! Might I suggest you recruit your people from Health Insurance Claims Departments? Now THOSE people are masters in weaselocity!

funny pictures of cats with captions
more animals

So, will there be a Holiday High Jinks: Part V? Gawd, I HOPE not!

I've spared you from the details of the Victoria's Secret shell game. They only allow three promo codes per order yet there are multiple codes in play AND I was shopping for both my daughters and myself. So, I've completely lost track of the number of orders I had to generate to take advantage of every combination of promo code and items to gain the maximum freebies at the minimum prices. GAK, maybe I should tackle the Big Three Auto Bailout next! Oh man, I won't even start with my opinions on THAT mess!

(Oh, btw, you may have noticed that I redecorated again. I have to admit that this Christmas color scheme is more my style.)

ADDED: WOOT! I just went back to to check on the price of the laptop I bought my oldest daughter (her old one is dying of old age) and not only is it $50 bucks LESS now, but there's a promo for a FREE designer(ish) laptop bag. So I called OfficeMax Customer Service and, while it was no problem to refund the $50 dollars, they couldn't send the laptop case without another purchase. So, I ordered another laptop WITH case and I'll just return the original one to the store for full credit since it's unopened. WOOT! We LOVE the discounts and freebies!

AUDIBLE to me, Today 12/15/2008 10:10 AM:
Thank you again for the reply. As requested, I've escalated this discussion to a supervisor. As a reminder, the Listener Rewards program you attempted to take advantage of was to issue a $10 coupon on or around December 23th for the purchase of four books at $14.95 or more. While at the time of the purchase, all of the books were not eligible, the regular prices for those books are clearly $14.95 or higher.

Taking this into consideration, coupled with the loyalty and patience you've already shown by using Audible, the $10 coupon has been issued to your account. Per the terms and conditions of the promotion, however, it will be dropped in your account on December 23, 2008 and will expire December 31, 2008

Once again, I do apologize for any inconvenience and thank you for your patience in this regard.

For additional questions, how to contact us and hours of operation, please visit us at:

Edwin S.
Audible Customer Support

OMGWTFBBQ- these people do NOT have it together AT ALL! So does that mean that on December 23rd I'll get ANOTHER $10 credit? Or does it mean that one hand has no idea what the other hand is doing over there at and ol' Edwin doesn't know I already received the credit? And maybe Edwin is a bit confused and is referring to Dec. 23rd but really means Dec. 8? Guess I'll find out on the 23rd.


KMont said...

Bev, I haven't told you yet, but I am all wide-eyed over these holiday shopping posts! You are amazing - I have no patience for the crap you've had to go through. I applaud you for your perseverance. Way to go!

Bev(QB) said...

Heh. Honestly, even though all the price shopping is time consuming, it's actually a kind of mental challenge game to ferret out the best deals.

But it DOES piss me off when a company tries to weasel out of their own deals or companies that won't stand behind their prices.

MB (Leah) said...

Audible, audible, audible. I saw that they were running 2 promos during Nov. and it was very confusing. I didn't take advantage of that %50 off sale and only did the "buy 4 books" thing. But I think it was very tricky of them to run both at the same time. I didn't know which promo would be used if I bought a book when both were going on, so I did the lazy thing and didn't bother.

I got my $10 thing quite by accident then, because I didn't bother about how much the books cost. So I got lucky I guess.

And I didn't know about this but I got $10 for my 6th month anniversary. Fine by me. :D

According to the rules though, you were correct. They shouldn't have run two promos at the same time.

By the way, 2 of the books I got were Charlaine Harris Sookie ones as well.

I hope you don't have any more issues, but good for you, fighting for what you should be getting.

Bev(QB) said...

You know, all they would have needed to do was say "Price paid must be over $14.99" instead of saying "Regular Price over $14.99" in the promotional rules. It's as simple as that.

They just HAVE to know that they screwed up. But instead of bending over and taking it like a man, they're whining and trying to slip out of it. THAT pisses me off.

JenB said...

OMG, can I please come live with you? Will you teach me your customer service secrets? :D

Anonymous said...

You my friend, are a goddess amongst women... Because I never have the patience for this kind of crap... Luckily my kids just want cash... So I give it to them and they buy their own dang presents..

I have to say, since going to this system, Christmas is a lot more fun for me...

Of course my hubby bought me a new drill set for Christmas and I was THRILLED! seriously... I have lusted for this drill set for months... I think I lost girlie points for that... I found out he bought it and made him give it to me early, because I needed it on a job... lol....

wytherin..still around, just little time for posting...

btw, havent heard what you thought of the new Merry... I read it, and for the life of me can't really remember it already... I remember scratching my head and rolling eyes at purple prose, but know I will read the next one too... I don't know why, but I do...

Bev(QB) said...

Jen, if you promise to be my wife and cook and clean and do laundry and grocery shopping, then YES, of COURSE you can come live with me! I mean someone has to do that shit and I think my family is catching on that no one does those things too often around here anymore.

Wytherin that's so funny! One year I told my hubby I wanted the Black & Decker cordless drill and circular saw set. He always has these big heavy drills around that are just too heavy for me to use right so I wanted my very own set. And YES, I DID use them quite proudly. Until we moved and I never saw them again because the got buried in the garage where various kids decided to use them and never put them back.

I used to watch Norm Abrams religiously and would LOVE to be a carpenter.

As to Merry and LKH, I WILL get some reviews done around here one of these days. I WILL!

Bev(QB) said...

Oh and if none of that makes sense, it's because I am under the influence at the moment. Haven't eaten since Monday except for Jello and broth and then this morning I had to drink most of a gallon of disgusting stuff then a screening colonoscopy. Fortunately, they drugged me up so I was out cold and happily snoring through the whole thing. But I'm still a bit wobbly and hope I don't regret drugged posting. :-D

MB (Leah) said...

Bev-ooh, I have to do that this year too. DH keeps bugging me to do it as well as my doc.

I was with DH when he had it done a couple of years ago. He was so funny afterwards, all slurry and saying hilarious things.

But what was really funny/odd, was that his doc came out and showed me the pics and told me all was well. WTF? LOL We weren't even married then, just dating. How nice to see my boyfriends innards. LOL

Anonymous said...

Oy, your killing me... I have a really easily triggered gag reflex and your setting it off just talking about this... I know I need to do one of these in the next few years and I seriously doubt my ability to keep that stuff down... (seriously I would make a great bulemic, but I cant stand the waste of good food)

who hopes all is well... and thanks you for giving me something to check on my internet travels... Hope you have a wonderful new year... (or at least not a completely sucky one)

Bev(QB) said...

A couple of tips: Schedule the colonoscopy for afternoon like I did. It means you go without eating a little longer, but it also means you aren't miserable all through the night because you won't be starting the gross stuff until morning.

Mix the gross stuff up with no flavorings added the night before and place in frig so it's very cold. Then when you start trying (*gag*) to drink it, you can experiment with flavors in each cup rather than mixing one flavor into the whole thing.

I probably wasn't supposed to do this, but it was the only way I could get that stuff down (and keep it down)- after pouring the gross stuff into a cup, I added orange Gatorade and some Squirt. It helped a lot. Fortunately, I only had to drink half the gross stuff (about 2 liters) because I had gone so long without eating.

Another tip: in addition to orange and lime Jello, they also make a nummy PEACH jello which is a pale orange and therefore an allowed color (no reds, blues, purples).

Final tip: Wanna get VERY RICH? Come up with a better way to prep for this damn thing!