From the Jeff Files

Yes, it's another of my brother-in-law, Jeff's, endlessly forwarded emails:

All women should live so long as to be this kind of old lady!

During one Sunday's service, the Minister asked, 'How many of you have forgiven your enemies?'

80% held up their hands.

After a rousing sermon on forgiveness, the Minister then repeated his question, 'How many of you have forgiven your enemies?'

ALL responded this time, except for one small elderly lady.

'Mrs. Neely? Are you not willing to forgive your enemies?'

'I don't have any.' She replied, smiling sweetly.

'Mrs. Neely, that is very unusual. How old are you?'

'Ninety-eight.' she replied.

'Oh, Mrs. Neely, would you please come down in front & tell us all how a person can live ninety-eight years & not have an enemy in the world?'

The little sweetheart of a lady tottered down the aisle, faced the congregation, and said,

'I outlived the bitches.'